I hate how nothing ever fits me. Everything is made for women with curves which I don’t have and don’t want to have. Well, women with curves, you unfortunately won and now the world only caters to you and your clothing needs. I guess I’m not a “real woman” according to the fucking people who design clothing. Well, fuck them.

I’m not a feminist. I’m just saying. If women want to break this stereotype of us being overemotional and not rationally minded, we should strive to be more involved in mathematics and the sciences to prove that a woman can be just as rational and logical as a man.

People complain that anorexics, such as myself, promote an unhealthy lifestyle, yet they idolize the other extreme and say that those women are idols because they embrace their unhealthy lifestyles. Personally, I don’t promote my unhealthy lifestyle. I’m going to therapy and trying to gain some sort of a life back, and I’m taking initiative and trying to fix my problem. The only thing I do promote is seeking professional help and I highly promote critical thinking and intelligence. Anyways, as far as the whole Adel situation goes, exercise is healthy. The human body is suppose to move. It’s not suppose to be forced into a state of stagnation. I understand loving to eat. Every human being loves to eat, and if they don’t, they’re simply lying, but you should train your body to love to eat the right kinds of foods such as fruits, veggies, nuts, and whole grains. Not greasy, chemically enhanced, processed foods and animal products. 

Moreover, one body type and one type of beauty shouldn’t be found to be superior to another. Sure, I don’t like curves and find curvy women such as Marilyn Monroe, Dita Von Teese, Kim Kardashian and others with similar body types to not be so beautiful, and would rather look at pictures of women like Nicole Richie, Mary Kate Olsen, or Kiera Knightley, but I don’t think my ideal of beauty is “right for everyone” if that makes sense. Everyone should be entitled to find whatever they want to be beautiful. It’s not your job to tell others that they are right or wrong. This goes for tastes in men or women or whatever you fancy also. 

If anything, thin women are the most oppressed in the United States. I’m sick of people asking me if I want to eat and saying that I should put some meat on my bones. I am sick of people forcing me to go to gatherings that revolve around food when I’d rather be doing my own thing. To me, food is just something I need to consume in order to survive. It isn’t this amazing experience to be feasted upon like a gluttonous idiot. If I don’t want to eat, don’t force me to. If I don’t want to be curvy or fat just like every other bitch in this fucking country, don’t tell me I should be. I do eat when I need to eat, I do get my periods (for those freaks who think I don’t), I am happy without feeling the need to shove greasy animal products down my face, and I am perfectly okay. 

Body acceptance… more like “fat people are better than skinny people, and we need to start getting the skinny people shoved up with food so that they can be accepted into society.”

Fuck that. I’m in love with my body, and I worked hard for it. Love is the ability to choose to make a sacrifice. I made a hell of a lot of sacrifices for my body, and I sure as hell am going to enjoy the skinny body that I have. If you think I represent a bad body image to weak minded girls because I’m not curvy and proud of it, then that is yours and those weak minded girls’ problem. Not mine.

So when people tell me that I’d still be skinny if I gained 5 to 15 pounds, I get frustrated. Yeah, okay. I was once 5 to 15 pounds heavier, and I didn’t think I was fucking skinny at all. What makes you think that I’d want to go back to where I was? Does that make sense? No. Also, I’m sick of people telling me that I’d be happier if I put on weight. I was more miserable when I was, in my opinion, fat, than I am now. Moreover, I’m sick of people saying to me “If you think you’re/ you were fat, you must think I’m huge.” Well, not to be too brutally honest, but use your rationality. If I think I’m/ I was fat, chances are, I think you’re fat as well. Sorry to break it to you, yet that’s just the truth. In addition, I am sick and tired of people telling me that curves are beautiful or a good thing. No, they’re not. If you need a fucking body acceptance movement just to make curvy women feel good about themselves, chances are, deep down, they hate being curvy. I’m not sorry that I actually am in the minority of women that are skinny and can fit into size 0 to 2 clothing without sucking in my stomach or fat, and that I have the measurements of a runway model. I’m not giving that up to be a part of the insecure majority. For the record, I am not insecure about my body. I’m just a hardcore perfectionist, and I don’t accept being just average or normal with regards to anything. Including my body and weight. Finally, I don’t give a fuck if guys like curves or something they can grab onto. I’m not in a rush to find someone, considering I’m more goal oriented, and so if a guy truly wants to be with me, they’ll have to accept me for the size I am. I’m not gaining a chubby disgusting ass, huge thighs, and fat, saggy, breasts for anyone. Sorry.

Bras increase the chance of breast cancer immensely, as well as being very unhealthy and restrictive to the female body. The muscles in the breasts need movement and exercise just like every other organ. I advise throwing away bras, and letting your breasts do their natural, healthy thing.

Well, women also live longer, statistically, than men do, so they must be doing something right to contribute to their longevity.

I have this disease, and I’ve had it since I was about 9 or 10. I’m now 20 years old. 10 to 11 years later, and I’m still in this prison involuntarily. If you wish to be in this mental hell like I am, I recommend you say goodbye to everyone and everything that you love, because you’re not going to be enjoying them for very long. I haven’t been legitimately happy for my entire life, and although I’m not an emotional person, I have to admit that it would be nice to experience the feeling of happiness. If you really wish to acquire this disease, I urge you to spend an entire week with an anorexic person, seeing all of our rituals, obsessive habits, crying spells, dizzy spells, seeing us struggle to do something as simple as taking a shower because our legs are shaking from lack of muscle, not being able to sleep at night due to the fear of not waking up the next morning, lying to our families and telling them that everything is getting better, while everything is getting worse, giving up hanging out with everyone, isolating ourselves in our rooms for days, our weigh ins, our painful punishments, etc. Anorexia isn’t a joke. This is not funny. This is not fun. This isn’t beautiful. This is hell. This is my prison. I am not cognitively free. If you think anorexia is “cool” or whatever, fuck you.

I think women need to grow the fuck up and stop begging society to accept them, and instead, learn how to accept themselves. Furthermore, some of you who label yourselves as “curvy” are, in fact, fat. You’re hypocrites because you go around saying how anorexics and skinny women aren’t beautiful because they promote eating disorders, however, you’re doing exactly the same. This isn’t fifth grade, and you aren’t children, and we don’t need to baby you and tell you how “everyone is special”… not everyone is special. If everyone is special, the word “special” would lose it’s meaning. You don’t see men with a lame body acceptance movement, do you? Maybe it’s because men are intelligent enough not to go around acting like children who need the world to treat them like a child so that “wittle baby can feel better about themselves.” Grow up.